Etiquette 101: Flash Photography
July 7, 2008 · Posted in etiquette, photography by anne
This week, E and I will be answering all of your etiquette dilemmas! Don’t forget to leave a comment here if you need a question answered.
Our first question, is it ok to tell guests not to use flash photography. Brooke asks:
My BMs think it’s a little bridezilla of me to not want my guests to use flash photography during my ceremony. I remember that my mom mentioned it was tacky when I was a little girl in my aunt’s wedding, so that has obviously stayed with me. Can I put a polite request in the program?
Before we answer, let us clarify a few things. The term Bridezilla should die a slow painful death. So let’s not use that, mkay?! We’ll assume you’re not requiring your bridesmaids to wear identical hairstyles and matching manicures and pedicures (on top of the cost of the dress, shoes, gifts, showers and parties). We’ll also assume that your bridesmaids are not paying for your professional photographer who could potentially have the big ceremony shots ruined by guests using flash. Finally, we’ll assume that they plan to have (or have had) their own wedding where they make the rules.
Our answer? I agree with your mother. It’s both tacky and rude to use flash photography during an important event like this. It is entirely appropriate to put a small line of text in the program reminding your guests to refrain from using flash photography (or cell phones) during the ceremony. Many churches won’t let even the professional photographers use flash, so most guests are familiar with this rule. We definitely don’t think it’s too much to ask of them. We would go so far as to have the day of coordinator ask guests to remove tripods and video cameras from aisles.
A.
(Hangs head in shame.) I’ve totally used my flash during the ceremony. And here I am, feeling the same way, that it’s tacky! Haha. Oh boy…I guess I’ll think about putting a line in my program about that too. :)
OH! It would be so fun to ask the pastor, minister, reverand, priest to say at the begining of the service, “We ask you in faith, to not use flash photography during my service”
That would be great!
I AM SO KIDDING! PLEASE DON”T DO THAT!
I agree, a small line of text in the program is absolutely appropriate!
Guests using flash also gets in the way of the pro that was hired - it can cause their photos to turn out incorrectly.
This is something I had never thought about, but will definitely be mentioning. Believe me, the little $200 point and shoot will never take a better shot than my photographer I am paying thousands of dollars for.
At my SIL’s wedding, the church nazi (really sweet lady except on Saturdays) posted a cute little sign outside the actual sanctuary and it was also in her programs and mentioned by the Nazi and her merry band of helpers. LOL I STILL think I remember seeing people take a couple of pictures though. I thought N. might come after them and drag them out by their ear. :) Her pro pics were great, but I would still tell people NO NO NO.
From our pov it’s always appreciated when the guests respect the bride’s request in the program. Course what about everyone who uses their cell camera. Got to love all that noise.
I agree the #1 rule is to respect what the bride and groom request, whether you agree with it or not.
That said, we had a few people use flashes during our ceremony, it didn’t bother me, it didn’t interrupt our professional photographer at all (that I know of) and we got some really wonderful pictures from the perspective of our guests that have ended up in our album and scrapbook. It’s a personal choice, but I just wanted to say it actually turned out to be a GOOD thing to have guests use their cameras, in our case.
hmm… i agree that it would be fine to ask the guests to refrain and that the guests should absolutely do so, but… what about those guests who aren’t going to be able to access/order your prof pics but who really really want a pic of the bride in her wedding dress? could you maybe let people take pics of the wedding party for five minutes after the ceremony is over? there has to be a solution so that everyone is satisfied…
YAY! I am doing this, and I really don’t want people snapping away. I want them to enjoy the moment! :-) I’ll just put a little line in the program somewhere about it.
I am going to include a photo or two with the thank you cards, so everyone should have a photo if they want one (or not!).
jls - ooh, perfect. hope your photographer can do a quick turnaround for you!
My church clearly stated no flash photography during the ceremony when I signed the paper work. Why?… because it was a religious ceremony. Maybe explaining it that way to the BMs would help?
We had a line in our programs requesting no flash photography. Of course, people took picutres anyway. I am secretly glad they did since my professional photographer was not allowed to do so!
@JLS: What a fantastic idea! I completely dropped the ball on the photos to guests. Is it too late now that we’re more than a year out?! :)
@feisty: That would be a great addition to the program. “No flash photography during ceremony, but the bride and groom will be available for snapshots directly after the ceremony.”
