Etiquette 101: Thank You Cards
July 15, 2008 · Posted in etiquette by anne
One of our fellow bloggers, Chitown Bride, wrote to ask about thank you card etiquette. She asks,
How long do you have to write your thank you cards after the wedding? My mother told me six weeks after the wedding, so I followed that rule. But it is funny, I have heard so many variations - six weeks after the honeymoon, six months after the wedding or even a year after the wedding (I think that person was actually confusing that rule with you have a year to give a gift after a wedding). Can you clear this one up for folks?
Ah, thank you cards. This simple task turns into something so dreaded and mind numbing. How do you thank someone creatively for the third crockpot without telling them you returned it for the duvet cover you really wanted? The answer? S-l-o-w-l-y. According to Emily Post you have three months after receiving the gift, so space the writing out over a few weeks. Take a few cards to work and write when you have a few spare minutes. Tuck them in a ziploc in your purse and write a couple while you are waiting. Like all big projects, if you spread out the work over time it won’t seem as intimidating!
If you forget to write within that deadline, don’t give up! Write when you can. Even if the card is late, you are still acknowledging the gift they gave.
A.
Definitely better late than never…. I’ve given more than one wedding gift and never received a thank you, and the bride later confessed that after a few months, she just gave up.
I, personally, took about a month to get mine done, but I was willing to take a tad longer to finish them up in order to make the thank you notes longer and more personal. I was sick of getting the “Thank you for the . We have always wanted one and will use it. Love, Bride and Groom” style thank you. Mine wound up being long, heartfelt, and thanked the guests first and foremost for coming to our wedding and letting them know how loved we felt for having them in attendance. They were a huge hit — my mother said for 3 straight weeks she was receiving phone calls and emails that people had never received such a well-composed thank you for a wedding gift. I figured if people were traveling and spending several hundred dollars on a gift, the least I could do was sit down and spend 10 minutes on each individual thank you!
