My fiancé is a law student in another state. The long distance portion of our relationship began in August, when he started school. We were living only 15 or so city blocks from one another when we got engaged and throughout the first 3 months of our engagement. The whole 2000 miles between us was quite the change.
The trick to this whole planning thing for me has been including him without interrupting his vital study time.Because we had to learn to carve wedding-planning time out of his schedule, we quickly learned how to focus on the point and then come to an agreement in a matter of minutes.
I’ve decided that the true genius of design is decision. Decision is what makes something truly special because it eliminates the ‘everything else’ that crops up as a result of careful research.
In an effort to give Superman a choice, I researched around 75 bakeries and narrowed it down to 40, then presented him with those options. He was overwhelmed and I translated that as disinterest. He became frustrated and after some thoughtful discussion, he said something brilliant.
“We can’t do everything. We have to pick what’s best. Best for us; Best for our wedding, yes, but best for our time and schedules.”
This outlook was new to me and oh so very helpful in the many discussions since. I just have to keep in mind that sometimes, protecting our stress levels and schedules is just as much a design decision as protecting our need to have the best baker in the city.
The stress of planning a wedding can be compounded by so many everyday requirements. I’m glad to be planning a wedding that reflects where we are right now, with all the challenges and difficulty this time includes. Will it reflect a couple who had hours and hours to call every baker in town? No. It will reflect a couple who made stylish choices in the face of other responsibilities and pursuits. I hope, and oh how I know it will reflect a couple deep enough in love to withstand a 2000 mile separation. A couple prepared for a lifetime of obstacles and happiness.
