Dress Shopping

“We need to have a talk,” Miranda said after the sales woman brought out an enormous tulle bridal dress for the upteenth time.  This of course is a scene from Sex and the City that mimicked my personal life for also the upteenth time, except that I was not as classy.

“NO.MORE.POOFY DRESSES,” I finally shouted exacerbated at the 4th bridal salon we had visited this week.  Yes, the 4th.  “I’m never going to find IT,” I told my mother in defeat.

Just like our venue, I was looking for a very chic, modern, simple affordable bridal dress with a little something special like a nice sash or neckline.  I wanted it mermaid, sans ruching, and very form-fitting – I’ll have plenty of years later on to cover up my body.  Yet for some reason, what the bridal associates heard  heard was, poofy. beaded. ruched. tulle. shiny. crystal.and 3x over my budget.

“I want to look more like a celebrity at the Oscars than a bride,” I finally elaborated.  “Please, just tight, simple dresses with no poof.”

“But you are a bride, you MUST look like one. Brides SHOULD wear ballgowns” one particularly vocal associate told me right before I walked out on her.

I have nothing against full or embellished dresses.  Rather, I admire the lace on Monique Lhullier designs and the tulle on Demetrios’ as a child admires chocolate-covered strawberries at the candy store…with fascination, awe and beauty.   I think both are absolutely breathtaking.

{If I was a different me, this gorgeous lace sensation would be my dress. Monique Lhullier “Rocha”}

But I however have always preferred hard candy over chocolate.  There is no blueprint for a wedding and brides should not feel pressured to fall into the norm.   I was surprised and annoyed at the amount of friction I felt when explaining my plain dress and can’t imagine how others may react to brides who want unconventional “bridal” dresses altering their color, cut, or length from the norm. No bride SHOULD wear what the norm has established a bride to wear but rather a bride should be able to choose whatever she feels most comfortable wearing the night of her wedding.

Here are my runners up.  All gorgeous dresses, but none of them are the One for me.

Alvina Valenta – Stunning, yet too romantic for my loft venue

Angel Sanchez- Perfect, but 9k over my budget

Understated and elegant, but too informal and $3k over budget.  Anna Maier/Ulla-Maija Couture

I’m going to salon #7 this week.  Let’s hope it’s my lucky number.