Conversations about the first look

I understand that first looks are the thing to do now and have been explained (in length) by several wedding photographers why it is easier on them for the bride to and groom to see each other before the ceremony…but I think not seeing each other before your walk down the isle is a tradition that should be kept. I can’t explain the joy and excitement both my husband and I got from seeing each other for the first time as I walked down the isle. I just think it takes a little out of the excitement when the couple see each other before hand..and you can always ‘fake’ a first look if you are just going for the photos.

Funny convo! RT @amiatEAD New on EAD Weddings: Conversations about the first look http://bit.ly/de4aeX

As a “staged” moment, I like it. I think the first look can lead to some wonderful & warm feelings – 1st looks are typically very emotional – even for the groom!

Love this! RT @amiatEAD: New on EAD Weddings: Conversations about the first look http://bit.ly/de4aeX

This is such a great topic and there is a lot of misunderstanding about “first looks” with couples and in the industry as well. As a wedding photographer, I realize the time constraints of the day and I realize the need to “get through” photos to make it to the reception and have a good time. These are some reasons why couples are, in increasing numbers, doing first looks. It seems as if a lot of planners and couples are simply thinking of the logistics of doing a first look and not the emotional, puristic side of doing/not doing one.
There is something so beautiful, so romantic, so passionate and emotional about a bride walking down the aisle and her husband-to-be seeing her for the first time. It cannot be described with words. I *love* that moment and the reaction of the groom when he sees his love walking toward him. I think we miss this with first looks and I hope that the trend goes back to waiting until the processional for the *real* first look. Thanks for hearing my thoughts/ramblings. Enjoy.

I totally agree with Kimberly! I got married this September and absolutely my favorite moment was the moment my love and I locked eyes in that ceremony room, with beautiful music playing and our friends and family around us. It was pure magic. Save that wonderful once in a lifetime excitement for the ceremony! I know you’re walking down the aisle together (which I think is such a lovely idea!) but try to work it so that you meet in the ceremony room for the first time. It will be worth it I promise you!
Hope Ava’s most recent blog post: Ballet Beauty….

Deciding to do a first look was one of the best decisions I made about my wedding – it was so special and so intimate (for more on my thoughts about my first look see the EAD blog post here: http://www.elizabethannedesigns.com/blog/2010/03/19/first-look/). And to comment on the “walking down the aisle” moment – I still had all sorts of butterflies walking down the aisle (I had to ask my dad to tell me jokes so I wouldn’t burst into excited tears!) and seeing Brian was so calming and wonderful. And Brian had the most wonderful look on his face when I saw him waiting there for me… It’s such a big moment – seeing each other at the ceremony for the first time – because you are about to get married, and I think that would be the case whether you do a first look or not.
Natalie’s most recent blog post: Wedding Wednesday – The Ceremony

I’m getting married this September, and we are definitely going to have a first look. I want us to see each other in private for the first time. We are both very private people, and I anticipate the emotion to be overwhelming. This will help calm me down as I walk down the aisle so I am all smiles.

The “privacy” element of the first look that Christina mentions above is exactly why my fiance and I will be doing one when we get married next month. We are both very private people and don’t necessarily want to share that special moment with anyone but ourselves… plus I can be a bit anxious… so I know seeing him before will have a calming effect.

I’ve recently seen two wedding, one where they waited for the isle and one where they did a first look and I have to say that I prefer the first look. They were so excited and just watching as the bride crept up on the groom was so enchanting and romantic. I personally believe that it give the bride and groom time to get to see each other and be together before the big rush of ceremony and reception. Some somewhat personal time together and I honestly believe that the pictures of the first look were the best of the bunch. I’ll be doing a first look at my wedding.

I love this conversation! This is exactly how all of my ‘consultations’ with the groom about various wedding related details go. And then I tell other people and they make me feel guilty that he doesn’t care. But there is an upside to having an un-opinionated groom. I get what I want! without guilt! HUZZAH! Anyway, thanks for posting this.
Emily L.’s most recent blog post: Beware the Ides of March

I am very much looking forward to out first look at our wedding in September. I am excited about for 2 reasons. The first is because I am so excited for that intimate moment that is going be shared with just the two of us alone. And to be able to capture that moment so perfectly on film. I don’t want to share that moment with anyone else because it will one of the only times during the day that will be just the two of us. To be able to talk and really see each other will not only be exciting and memorable but also calming for what we are about to do together. I think the walk down the aisle will still be special & memorable still but also shared with everyone else. The other reason is because one of the most important aspects of my wedding is the photos. We have an extremely talented photographer and I can’t wait to spend 2 to 3 hours taking awesome, really amazing photos – which we wouldn’t have time for if we didn’t do the first look. Photography is a priority to me, where some other things in weddings are a priority to other people. It is a very personal choice that is a personal reflection of each couple as the rest of the wedding is.

I wasn’t super traditional when it came to my recent wedding, but one thing I knew I wanted to do was not see each other before. and I am so glad we waited. It was so emotional and wonderful to lock eyes with my husband as I walked down the aisle. I wouldn’t want to give that up for anything. And even though a first look allows for more time for pictures, we got plenty of good pictures anyways. For me, it was just something that was worth the wait…
chandra’s most recent blog post: DIY Photo Booth / Polaroid Station

This is one of those wedding things that really polarizes people! Mo, there aren’t too many people out there that feel like the boy and don’t have a strong opinion one way or the other about first looks.

I was in a wedding five years ago and it was the first time I had ever heard of a first look. I remember being totally freaked out by it and the lack of “tradition”. Now that my turn has come, I couldn’t imagine not doing one for so many reasons: calming nerves, private moment, time issues, etc. My fiance was skeptical at the beginning but after hearing a few testimonials from couples that did a first look convinced him. I think it’s such a radical idea when you first hear it that it takes time getting used to.

I feel like I may be crazy here but the aisle/isle thing makes me crazy :)

Thank you to everyone for all of your thoughtful comments! Since we will be walking down the aisle together, seeing each other at the aisle is not an option. BUT after reading through everyone’s comments I think we will be doing a first look, or private time together, or whatever we feel like calling it that day. :)

What I find interesting is that no one has mentioned the third option–not doing either! We did consider getting ready together, but decided logistically that it didn’t work. I doubt anyone in my family knows what a first look is, so I’m sure I’ll have to explain it to a few of them. Let’s hope no one rolls their eyes, which I can totally see happening.

@Natalie: Your first look pictures were adorable!! I really enjoyed reading that post, thank you for sharing your experience with us.

@Emily: I’m glad I’m not alone! Beyond who will be there, the food, and our getting married, the boy isn’t too concerned about all the other details. Smart, isn’t he? ;)
Mo’s most recent blog post: Death by Wedding Invitations

oh my gosh, absolutely have a first look. it’s not really just about oohing at how gorgeous you two are :) but more so about having a moment alone just for the two of you. this is really the only opportunity you have throughout the day to do that and it is soo special! i always get emails from clients after the wedding telling me how that was one of the best decisions they made and how special that moment really was. have a wonderful wedding day!
Cristi’s most recent blog post: Nicole & Adam *Wedding at Sanctuary*

Great comments on having a First Look at your wedding: http://bit.ly/bYrbsn

I want my “first look” to be across the isle :) No meeting beforehand. It’ll feel familiar: the way I feel when I come through the door at the airport and approach him as he stands there all smiles. Nothing impersonal about it.
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