Fortunately, the answer to the above question is “yes.” But it’s not easy.
I’m like Charlotte York. And I don’t mean in the adorable, head-band wearing, beautiful, and eternally optimistic way. I am like Charlotte York in the I-am-rigid-and-like-for-my-home-to-be-pristine way. I’m probably the world’s worst roommate– if you’re messy. You’d love me if you’re tidy! Remember on Sex and the City when Charlotte and Harry finally got married and she was so happy? Her only problem was that Harry’s home habits didn’t fit with Charlotte’s very clean, tidy lifestyle in her very white, Park Avenue apartment.
Yep. I’m Charlotte. I truly believe that everything in my home has a place and if it doesn’t currently have a place I’m going to run to Hobby Lobby or The Container Store to buy a beautiful container to make sure it has a place. I am the queen of baskets, buckets, bins, label makers, and storage.
My dear husband is nearly perfect. Except for one thing. The major difference in our lifestyles that made newlywed life a challenge was the value that we each place on being tidy.
Just like any man would do, he walks in the house, puts his keys on one surface, takes out his wallet and puts it on another surface, unloads his change and drops it on the kitchen counter, and then goes upstairs to our bedroom to change clothes. He practically leaves a trail a breadcrumbs on his way and I walk behind and pick everything up.
I realized quickly that buying him a handbag wasn’t going to work, so I went to Pottery Barn. I bought two baskets. One basket belongs to him and the other belongs to me. I drop my keys and cell phone in my basket and he does the same in his basket. The baskets sit nicely on a bookshelf just inside our doorway. Problem solved. All I had to do was provide a solution to the problem before telling him that I saw his pocket-emptying habits as a problem and cause our first marital fight.
Mail is our other issue. We don’t have clutter in our house because I de-clutter on a seasonal basis. I have to donate so many items per year to our Junior League rummage sale, so it works out nicely for me to purge everything a few times a year and just get rid of anything we don’t use. Our clutter comes from the mail.
A few weeks ago I could pick up about four piles of mail throughout the house on four different surfaces. The kitchen table, the entry table, the kitchen counter, the mail was everywhere. I ran to Target to find the solution.
I picked up an adorable expand-o file box from Real Simple and labeled each of the dividers: bills, insurance, retirement, invitations, personal. Every day I put the mail in one of those folders and our household “rule” is that the files must be empty by the end of the week. We also have a filing cabinet in our home office where all of the important documents end up if they must be saved. Everything else can be thrown away once it has been taken care of.
The file box is so cute that it can stay on the kitchen counter. The best part is if someone is coming over and gives five minutes notice, I don’t have to rush around the house picking up stacks of mail and hiding things in drawers– and making life really difficult for us when we have to find everything and sort through it again.
Expanding File by Real Simple for Target – $14.99 at Target stores
Does anyone else have any helpful hints on how to organize your home when you’re living with a disorganized husband? Is anyone married to a man who is more organized than you?
Twitter: @cheesefiend
T and Evs would get along great! As would you and me (duh!) – bins for everything! And some simple Husband Training to go along with the bins for everything!
Twitter: @socalnewlywed
Hahah, yup, I’m super organized. The hubby, not so much. We bough a key/wallet valet for our entryway which helped a lot. We have an “in” box in our office for mail and stuff.
Also he never wanted to hang up his clothes after work, so I had him put hooks on the inside of the french doors in his closet to now he hand hang clean pants and jackets over those instead of leaving them on the ground.
Twitter: @honeysucklelife
In my life, the hubby is super organized. I’m moderately so. He creates a place for me to put things and then I follow.
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Twitter: @amiatead
sigh – you guys would HATE ME!
i’m SO completely unorganized. i try, i really do. but the shoes go by the door and the mail goes on the end table and then my clothes go by the hamper (BY the hamper, not IN the hamper— yes, i realize that is lazy).
i need you girls to come to Chicago and get me straightened out!
I hate to push the blame onto my fella, but I have to say that his messiness definitely drags me down. I love things tidy, but I get so sick of reminding him to pick up his wet towels, wipe down the counter etc., that I either work up the energy to do it myself (rare) or live with it (more frequent). Life is so much more smooth on those weeks when we both make the effort to pick up our crap!
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omg, i feel SO much better now. I thought Nate was the only boy who made bread crumb trails of crap around the house….literally placing everything he owns in different areas, just to spite me, I’m sure. Don’t even get me started on the mail piles he makes, either. Whew. Perhaps I will have him read this post, dear Erin, thank you so much!
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I am totally with you! In fact, I just had a post about this on my blog.
Mail has also been a big problem in our household… but I like your idea and may run out this weekend to get my own file box! Right now, it stacks up on the table and in the openings of our antique bar. The problem is that he is horrible about going through his mail. Maybe if I get a system down like this, he’ll be better??
And good for your hubby using the basket for his catch-all! Mine is not so good. I created an area in our bedroom with a dish and lots of space. It got filled up and he went back to the counter, kitchen table, and other flat surfaces! Ugh!
Hope you’re doing well mama!