Last minute ideas

In case you need some last minute Halloween costume ideas for those raging parties this weekend, allow me to display years worth of somewhat clever and always hilarious outfits. Let’s step into the Halloween time machine for a second, shall we?

#1 1999. Our freshman year of college. I believe my best friend and I are ‘Julia Goolia Spice’ and ‘Hannah Banana Spice’. We are possibly related to the Spice Girls in some way, but mostly we fell prey to they common sport of dressing inappropriately just because it’s Halloween. Shameful, really.

#2 2000. Our sophomore year in college. As you can read in my caption, we are a ‘Pure Angel’ and ‘Evil Angel.’ I had to edit this one a bit but I cannot help but chuckle. The hooker boots are key, my friends.

#3 2001. Junior year in college, fresh out of traveling abroad for a semester. In case you can’t tell, I am a green M&M. I decided not to show you my white hooker boots again. One can only handle so much. Our sorority ruled, by the way.

#4 2003. [I believe I was visiting my then-boyfriend, Nate, in 2002 and thus missed out on the Halloween madness in 2002.] Hannah and I go as ‘white trash’ and hang out in the Central West End. We are now living off campus and obviously very attractive. That would be actual trash and plastic-wrap on our bodies.

#5 2005. [In 2004 I was living in Arkansas during Halloween during a clinical. Again, I missed the debauchery.] This year was a fun one, as we were officially out of college. Nate and Ryan are Ninja Turtles [yes, those are youth sized costumes] and Maggie and I are….

…the ladies from Full House! Maggie is Stephanie, I am Michelle, and Lindsey is D.J. Why Michelle has to wear so much self-tanner, I don’t know. And why D.J. has to sport those hideous bangs, I cannot say. Yikes.

#6 2006. Again, with Maggie and Ryan we go as….Double Dare contestants!!!

And of course, once we were married and boring and stuff, we no longer dressed up for Halloween. Therefore, Double Dare is the last costume I donned.

But I won’t stop there, dear readers. Not only did my college years bring multiple Halloween parties but when you join a sorority you sign a waiver to attend at least 5 costume parties each yaer. True story. [or not].

The following outfits were not worn on Halloween, but on random ‘events’ out with the sorority. I do not remember dressing up this much, but it’s probably for the best.

#1. The Rock Star switch with the Delta Sigs in 2000. Please guess what I am:

If you guessed Missy Misdemeanor Elliott…..the African American, large rapper…..you are correct. Remember her trash bag shirt on one of her music videos? No? Okay, nevermind.

#2 Tacky Prom with the Pikes, spring of 2002. Yes, my friends, this outfit is what I wore the night I met my future husband. Our relationship is special, let’s leave it at that.

#3 Fall of 2002. I was a Pi Chi for recruitment week. That meant I disaffiliated and helped baby freshman during rush week. The Pi Chis all dressed up for one of the days of rush, and what did I wear?

Um, that is me in the front dressed as Nelly. Please note that all of the other girls are cutsie, girlie, pretty characters. Then there is me, dressed as another African American rapper. I never claimed to be ‘normal’, okay?

#4 2003. Another Tacky Prom with the Pikes. The handsome fellow on the left would be Nate, and the other lads would be his future groomsmen. Yes, we are a beautiful bunch, I know.

And finally, if you are of my kind and believe in dressing up your animals for the sheer fun of it, you’ll appreciate Henry’s time warp into Halloween hell. Back in 2006 I decided to buy him this adorable pumpkin outfit. It did not fit, however, and my poor baby…not even one year old at that time….was so ticked at me. I cannot help but laugh at these pictures:

And that’s it, my doves. Plenty of reminiscing for you complete with embarrassing photos of yours truly. I hope you enjoyed and pondered what hideous costumes you’ve worn in the past. Perhaps you’ll rush out to buy a ‘pure angel’ costume, or one of my numerous rapper outfits instead? Please tell me you’ve worn hideous costumes, too.