Recently I’ve been overwhelmed by baby shower offers, which is an incredibly pleasant thing to be overwhelmed by if you ask me. However, as someone who didn’t really intend on having a shower (maybe an open house type after baby?) I haven’t given any thought at all to a registry. When a close friend brought up the idea once again I said yes and the planning began. I would have preferred to use alternate registry options, such as my personal favorite Wishpot, but the host (who is also a mother to an 8 month old) advised creating one at a physical location as well. I chose Babies”R”Us for its close proximity to my apartment, making returns easier just in case any well-intentioned guests decided to veer off the registry and pick up items we know we won’t use, and set about creating an online wish list of things I’d be able to open with a genuine smile.
My favorite item found on my Wishpot registry. I’m sure my organic farmer father would love to see his first grand-baby wearing this! From seller Twig and Closer on Etsy.
Aside from the daily “registry update” emails I seem to be unable to escape from, creating this second registry wasn’t so bad. Except at the very beginning, when they forced me to put down my due date to continue the sign-up process! Though I’ve been a bit more liberal about tossing it out toward the end, for the most part my exact due date has been held close. I’ve heard the stories from other women, detailing how miserable those last few weeks are, which is often compounded by the endless inquiries dropped in casual conversation by well-intentioned yet clueless strangers making jokes along the lines of “You still haven’t had that baby yet?” Trust me, with cankles, tiny feet in her ribs, trips to the bathroom on the hour every hour, heartburn, and the inability to lift herself off the floor, she would like to be able to provide you with an answer other than “Nope, not yet” accompanied by a rather forced smile.
This is why, on the Babies”R”Us registry… I lied. I pushed the date back by several days, hoping it might eliminate some of those questions for me. When people ask when I’m due, instead of responding with a due date, I give a due month, April. According to the American College of Midwives, only 5% of babies are born on their actual due date. Baby is considered full term at 37 weeks and can bask in my uterus for about 42, and so I think it’s silly to pinpoint a specific date on the calendar. As my belly gets bigger, and I start to look more miserable, I’m going to hold firm to my belief in the due date. There is no magic number, baby will come when s/he is ready and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Will you join me in my anti due-date campaign?
Let’s rephrase the question from “When are you due?” to “What month are you due?”. That way, the woman can decide what route she wants to take. If voicing the actual due date is important to them they can, but if they’re like me they’ll be free to answer however they please.
Oh, and if I respond to your question (no matter how you phrase it) with “April”, please don’t lean in and say “I mean, what day?” I feel bad when I feel cornered into telling lies, even little white ones that save my sanity.