The lovely lady who is designing our wedding invitations emailed me today to start the design process for the invitation suite. The primary thing she needs to start is the wording, which I initially thought “no problem, I’ll just google ‘invitation wording’ and copy, paste” – boy was I wrong. First of all, there are SO MANY options out there: casual, formal, church ceremony, dry reception, etc. Thankfully, I knew exactly what I wanted it to “feel” like, so making choices there wasn’t a struggle. However, I hadn’t thought at all about the fact that my mom didn’t take my dad’s last name when they got married. She’s not a raging feminist, she just liked her name and so she kept it (and she doesn’t care at all that I am changing my name when I get married).
To be honest, this is the first time in my life that this has ever really presented a problem for me. Sure, other people might have been confused, but I always knew my parents were happily married, despite the fact that they didn’t have the same last name, so I never cared what other people thought. For some reason, now I care. Do I write:
“Ms. Mom Sassy and Dr. Daddy Cool
request the pleasure of your company…”
or
“Dr. Daddy Cool and Ms. Mom Sassy
request the pleasure of your company…”
or
“Ms. Mom Sassy and
Dr. Daddy Cool
request the pleasure of your company…”
or
“Dr. Daddy Cool and
Ms. Mom Sassy
request the pleasure of your company…”
What are the implications of all of these options above? I’m pretty sure that separate lines means divorced, but I’m not sure. And I think in a couple with differing last names the woman is supposed to go first, but, again, not sure…
Adding to my invitation dilemma is the fact that I have my mom’s last name as my middle name. Typically (I think) the names are listed with the bride’s first and middle names and the groom’s full name, like this:
“Ms. Mom Sassy and Dr. Daddy Cool
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Natalie Sassy
to
Brian Witty Cutie”
However, if I follow tradition, I’m worried people will think my parents are divorced and that I have my mom’s name, especially if I follow the “woman comes first” as far as their names go! And furthermore, if people think that this is the case, maybe they’ll think that my mom paid for the whole thing (doesn’t coming first sometimes mean that?) and that would most certainly not do…
I could do just Natalie…
“Ms. Mom Sassy and Dr. Daddy Cool
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Natalie
to
Brian Witty Cutie”
But that seems too short, especially if Brian’s whole name is there… So, what about my whole name:
“Ms. Mom Sassy and Dr. Daddy Cool
request the pleasure of your company
at the marriage of their daughter
Natalie Sassy Cool
to
Brian Witty Cutie”
Too long? Slapping tradition in the face? Totally tacky? Just right? I have NO IDEA! Help!!
I want people to get the invitation and just think “Natalie and Brian are getting married! Yea!” not spend twenty minutes trying to figure out what in the heck is going on with my family… you know?
Any words of wisdom out there?